TEA, Anyone?

This may seem odd for a Memorial Day post. Actually, this post has taken on many incarnations since it started percolating in my head. Hope I don't have to make it a two-parter. I hope I can pull the whole thing together.

I know some of you aren't going to agree with me. That's OK. In fact, that is kind of what this is all about.

Memorial Day is to honor the military who have died in service. It started as a Civil War celebration but was later expanded to include all wars.

There has been a very obvious movement over the last year or so in the political world. The TEA (Taxed Enough Already) Party. They have protested certain things and supported others, but they have been very vocal in their beliefs.

And that's fine with me. I don't have to agree with them but I will absolutely defend their right to say it.

Some of what they have been saying, and I myself have said here, is coming true. We've seen incumbent politicians being voted out of office of late. The word is finally getting out. "Career Politician" should be an oxymoron. Unfortunately that phrase is typically only half right. It is time for a true change in the way our country is being run.

That statement is not aimed at the President. It it aimed at the whole kit and caboodle.

We have some serious problems in this country. You and I may not agree exactly on what they are, but I daresay everyone reading this would agree with that statement. Change, of some sort, is necessary.

But what does that have to do with Memorial Day, you ask?

Plenty. Let's go back to the very first folks who died in military service to this country. The Revolutionary War. Those men died for our freedoms. Every war since has been in defense of those freedoms. In some cases our citizens died fighting in countries that currently disagree with our political outlook on things.

People died so that we could have a representative government. Died so that if we speak out against that government we don't have to fear a knock on the door in the dead of night. Died so that the people could have a real say in how this country was run.

And it is working.

People can speak up. They can freely protest the Arizona Immigration Law if they choose. They can vote out a politician that is no longer representing their beliefs and values. They can express their opinion on out of control spending or taxes or social programs.

Anything and everything they don't like they can say.

All because men (and women later on) believed in it so much they were willing to die for it.

Remember, most of the wars in which this country has participated were fought by volunteers. Men who in believed in State's rights over the federal government. Men who wanted to stop dictators and communism. Men who believed that this way, our way, of life was the best way to live.

In some other countries, I couldn't write this. In some simply because I'm female. In others because I disagree with our government. In some, just because.

So it is important for us to remember, every day not just the last Monday in May, that we live a free life because of the sacrifices of many men and women. We can hold our parades and our protests. We can speak up or remain silent.

We have choices.

So, whether or not you agree with the TEA Party movement, or any other movement, we have to respect the right to move.

Without it, we are nothing.

Happy Memorial Day. Thank a solider if you see one. Hug him if your can. Pray for the safety of those still fighting.

Remember, above all, the ones who didn't make it home. You can thank them in your prayers tonight.

And while you're at it, thank them for the freedom to pray at all.

Sweet Thing

I am a huge Keith Urban fan. I make no bones about it. From what I have read and the interviews I've seen, he and his wife strike me as a couple of down to Earth folks that you could invite over for a cookout, throw some burgers on the grill and split a pitcher of tea. He appears to be a wonderful humanitarian. Generous with his time and resources when disasters strike or in his support of St. Jude's Children's Hospital.

And as easy as Keith is on the eyes, I enjoy him most when my eyes are closed, my earphones are plugged in and I'm listening. Listening to his voice, the words of his songs and the magic his fingers work on his guitar. I will, and have, listen to him for hours on end.

Being very secure in the knowledge that Keith is not going to ride up to our front door on his motorcycle and sweep me off my feet, Billy supports my fandemonium. (I support his, too. And he enjoys Keith Urban almost as much as I do.)

Even indulges me on occasion.

Like August 6, 2009. The day after our 20th anniversary.

Our anniversary fell on a Wednesday last year. It also fell on Billy's regular week to work in Arkansas. So he was there and I was home with the pack. Yes, Billy could have changed his schedule. He reminds me all the time that he works for himself. He could have been home for our anniversary and gone a little later.

But he is as good a son as he is a husband and Keith Urban was in North Little Rock on August 6th and his mom really wanted to go to the show. There was no way I could make it. The logistics were just too much.

So he took her.

I had had a long couple of days on my own. Around 9:30 the night of the 6th I crawled into bed, lights out, everyone was quiet. I'm just about to fall asleep.

The phone rings.

Caller ID says its Billy.

But what I heard on the other end of the line was not Billy's voice but "Hit the Ground Running" - the opening song of Keith's show.

Billy held the phone for almost 30 minutes so I could hear, calling back every so often as needed. He did it until I had to go to sleep (can't stay up past 10 on a "school night"). Just so I could "be there" with him and catch a little bit.

Then he came home with this T-shirt from the show.


(For those that don't know, "Sweet Thing" is one of the hits from Keith's Defying Gravity CD)

With this story to go with it.

Apparently, Billy had his eye on a different T-shirt but this particular booth only had them in extra large sizes. Billy said no, he'd go look at a different booth. Not wanting to lose a sale, the girl selling kept trying to convince him that it was a child's extra large or ran small or anything to get him to buy it.

After a couple of minutes of this he finally stopped her and said, "Ma'am, my wife has lost 50 pounds. I'm not taking home an extra large ANYTHING", to which the lady waiting beside him leaned over and responded, "Good call".

I don't know, she may have been right. But I happen to think the "good call" was on my part.

The evening of December 21, 1988.

When I said "yes" to my Sweet Thing.

It's All Worth It!

I was sitting with a client the other day going over some questions I had for the audit. As we were actually looking at paper and not the computer, my screen saver came on after a few minutes. Like any good mom, my screen saver is scrolling pictures from my laptop. Most of which are, you guessed it, puppies.

She watched for a few minutes. Then commented. "There's so many. How do you set yourself up for that much heartbreak?"

In 2001 I asked myself a similar question, only it was more in the form of "What have I done?" Although our sweet little Stormy was our second "baby" she was the first one we lost. She was 11 years old and had silently developed a heart disease. We didn't know until it was too late. She died in my arms.

Billy and I took it extremely hard. I guess because it was so unexpected and all. And it felt just so unnecessary since she'd been nothing but a little bundle of love and joy and happiness and I couldn't believe she'd been taken from us. I remember driving away from the emergency clinic, carrying out a box containing my angel, and screaming at the sky. And yelling to my daddy that he would have to look after Stormy now and I was pretty sure his allergies wouldn't bother him in Heaven.

And later it hit me. I would have to go through this 3 more times, and probably sooner rather than later. Christy was a year old than Stormy and Molly was less than a year younger. (Midnight was new to our family and only about 4 or 5 years old at time so she I wasn't worried about, yet anyway.)

What had I done? I had set myself up for heartbreak.

Repeated heartbreak.

So, I understood her question.

She told me that she'd lost three dogs in about the last three years and couldn't imagine getting another one and having to go through that again.

I understood her sentiment.

But for us, getting more was just a no-brainer. Look at all these faces!
















What a group!!

Having been through it three times myself, each time extremely painful, I still can't imagine opening my front door at night and not seeing this! They come out of the woodwork - literally it seems sometimes - and come running up to me. Falling all over each other, trying to get to the front. Knocking over pictures and anything else in the way of a wagging tail, excited yips and yaps echoing through the entry hall.

That is why we do it.

Though I could be all altruistic and say it is all about saving the puppies from a certain demise (all the ones currently in our house are rescues of some sort) but it really is for us. Our pleasure. Our happiness. Our enjoyment.

Sure, it hurts when they leave us. But that's Life, isn't it? Life without some pain is really just going through the motions. Pain is growth. And living with them has taught me so much about myself. I can do things - Mommy Things - that I'd never dreamed I could do, just to take care of them as best we can.

Because I think it's all worth it. When you're tired and they curl up next to you, head on your lap. When you're ready to scream at the next person that cuts you off in traffic but come home to puppy slobber all over your face. When something else in your world has saddened you and all you need is a smile. They are always there.

Always loving. Never judging. Ready for anything, or nothing at all. Teaching us.

Yes, I will cry when I can't see my blue-eyed Frankie any more and my heart breaks a little every time Riley has a seizure episode. I worry about all of them. Sure, we could have more money and tons of free time if we didn't have them to look after. With no two-legged children to tie us down we could be free as birds. But it seems awfully empty. A life unfulfilled.

Hardly sounds worth living, now does it?

What to Do?

After the oil rig explosion recently, there has been a lot of talk of stopping offshore drilling. I see it on Facebook. The President has said it. I hear it around town. Several of the eleven men that died were from this area.

I suspect last month there was similar talk in West Virginia after the mine explosion.

And probably every time there is a mine collapse or similar tragedy.

I do sympathize. I have several friends here in town whose husbands work offshore. We were very fortunate they were not involved. I can't really imagine what my friends went through in hearing about the story. And the environmentalist side of me is certainly conflicted. I can't stand seeing all those animals covered in oil.

But, unlike a coin, this issue has many sides.

To stop mining or drilling would literally put thousands of men and women out of work. At a time when unemployment is already way too high. Some people in parts of this country have been without work for over a year and flooding that market with thousands more.... It just doesn't seem very responsible. If economic conditions were different, maybe.

But even then, I heard a miner's family say it is just a way of life for them. Generations follow generations into those mines. Like policemen and firefighters in New York City. It is just what some families do. They mine. I don't know if it is the same on the oil rigs, but I suspect there is some truth there as well, but maybe not quite so prevalent.

The flip side, commercial fishing is taking a beating right now because they can't harvest in oil-soaked waters. We're all going to pay more for the shrimp, oysters, crayfish, and other fish went they do start back up. Those families are hurting right now.

And from an economic standpoint, does it make sense? I've been pretty vocal that I think America needs to take care of herself. If we don't do what it takes to harvest our own natural resources, or to develop viable means to replace oil and coal, then it has to come from somewhere else. Aren't we dependent enough on foreign sources? Do we want to put ourselves in a position where $4 and $5 a gallon gasoline is the norm and we can't do anything about it because there is no bargaining chip? That doesn't seem very responsible either.

I know there are some alternatives out there, but change is slow. And I don't know enough about some of them to understand if there aren't risks associated with their production as well. How are corn and soybeans turned into fuel? Can enough electricity be generated to run all the cars this country seems to need? I don't know.

Life has risks.

So, the easy answer is just to stop. Stop everything dangerous. But the realities are not that easy. Every decision has repercussions. How do we know what the best path will be? It isn't as if you can just stop for a year and see what happens. And there are other sides to this issue that I haven't even thought of yet - on either side of the main question.

But is has always been this way. Good men died laying railroad tracks across this country decades ago. Train travel became a way of life and trains are still an important way of moving large amounts of goods from coast to coast and border to border.

Moving forward will always have the occasional setback. And the truth is, while we're hearing about two tragedies very close together, these accidents really are few and far between. Loss of life is always hard and never acceptable. But accidents happen (and please don't tell me the mining explosion wasn't an accident - I'm aware of the long list of safety violations lodged against the company). And it sometimes takes a tragedy to discover how something could be done better to prevent a future, similar, tragedy. Sometimes the baby only learns what "hot" means after they actually touch the stove.

So, back to my question. What to do? I wish I had an answer.