It's Just a Day

This posts falls into the category of "I had a thought, I wrote, and then I forgot to publish it."  I thought I had though.  A friend on Facebook (and in real life, we just haven't seen each other since high school, probably) expressed a sentiment recently similar to what I had said here, and I knew I had a post about it so I went to find it and do a repeat performance.  Only I found it in the Draft folder and not the Posted folder.  In rereading it, I realized it didn't need much to be finished.  I originally wrote it several years ago so a few of the references are dated, but still valid.

Hope you enjoy it.


Valentine's Day is but once a year, right?

Depends.  Yes, according to the Julian Calendar.  No, according to me.

I started to write this post last year when I heard many of my Facebook friends, and some others that I could actually see and touch, lamenting how terrible it was that their husband/boyfriend/significant other hadn't done anything for them for Valentine's Day.  No flowers, no candy, no cards.  Nothing.

Whenever these conversations start I hesitate to jump in.

I can count on one hand, pretty much, the number of gifts Billy has gone out and purchased for a specific event. 

My engagement ring was a Christmas present, that was 1988.  Christy, my first baby, was my first Christmas present that year we were married (1989).  Christmas 1991 saw a few presents because we had both used all our accrued vacation time to move to Kansas City and couldn't go to Arkansas for the holiday.  I remember he bought me a set of purple glass Corning cookware.  I can't recall one birthday or anniversary gift - ever.  1989 or 1990 was probably the last time I got anything for Valentine's Day either.  I do remember getting flowers and a teddy bear one year when I worked at Ernst in Little Rock, but not sure if was the engaged year or the married year.

Yet, I want for nothing. 

Yesterday, a package came for Billy, that he ordered, and in it were 6 bottles of bubble bath for me, just because he knows I like to take bubble baths. 

Newest iPhone, also coming to me.  All I said was that a friend had one and I thought they were interesting.  He went to AT&T and picked one out and is having it shipped.

Anything I show him in a magazine - cool purple running shoes, new exercise clothes, fun gadgets - his first words are always "get you some!" and if I don't, he will.  He has come back from Arkansas many a time with a bag of goodies for me. 

He just knows me, and what I like.

Who's up every morning, asking what time we're leaving to walk?  Yep.  Have a race to run, he's right there.  Up early, tending to the animals so I can gather my stuff and then waiting at the finish line with a big grin across his face.  (Almost a big as the one across my face).  The only one he's not sure he can attend is when I do a half Ironman distance triathlon, but only because it will take me all day to do it.  We're still working on that one.

So, if someone asks what I got for this occasion or that reason, I don't have the answer they are looking for. 

Nothing, because I didn't need it.
Nothing, because I already have it all.

You see, I married a giver, just not a "gift-giver". 

And that is how I believe it should be.  

It means so much more to me to know that he listens, and cares, and does whatever he can to make my life easier.  His schedule is more flexible so he goes to the grocery store for us; he does laundry and housework. After those morning walks he comes back and fixes my breakfast and coffee to go while I am getting dressed for work.  Lunch is on the table every day, waiting for me.  And dinner is always in the works when I get home.  

These gifts are way sweeter than an box of chocolates and last much longer than a bouquet of roses.  Daily reminders of how he feels about me, unsolicited, and free from the pressure of getting the perfect gift for that one day that the World that says you are supposed to have one.

See, in our house February 14 is just another day on the calendar - same as February 13 and February 15.  Or May 18, August 5, December 25, October 19, and on and on.